Values Bring Joy | Family Brings Joy

The Things We Do

September 24, 2014 By Shan 2 Comments

You never know how much good you do…

Well doesn’t this bring perspective. I can relate to this mom’s day all too well (except she fits in a family prayer in the morning.) However, not all my days are filled with helping others outside my home, such as this one. But, it does seem there are days where service is jam packed into one day or one week. As the saying goes, “When it rains it pours.”

This reminds me of my last post…I went on and on about how I can blog again now that the kids are back in school. I have one less child at home…yet she could drive and was helpful when I needed help with the kids. Since the kids have been back to school life has been filled with unexpected happenings. The most recent was saying goodbye to my Brother-In-Law who passed away after suffering another stroke. If ever there was a family man, it was him. Praying for my Sister, Nephew & Nieces.

Brother in law familybringsjoy.com

Before that happened, I helped prepare my oldest for her study abroad trip in Turkey and Greece. Today she embarked on her first day of sight seeing in Greece. I’m extremely grateful she made it there safely with all that is going on in the country right next door. She will be touring for about 3 weeks. If ever there is a time for this mom’s faith to be tested, it is now. Feel free to pray with me for her safety every day until she returns home.

Daughter created this double exposure of herself.

My youngest daughter is a dancer. Dance is what makes her happy. She comes by it honest, as it is one of my favorite past times. We thought we had found her a new dance studio before we moved back to Texas. Upon moving here, we found out some information which led us to not use that particular studio. We tried one studio in which they made her audition. The dance instructor said she would need to be in a class with kids much younger than her based on her ballet skills only. Her words were, “She can’t help it, she was taught in Oklahoma.” To say this rubbed us the wrong way is an understatement. We absolutely adored my daughter’s dance teacher in Oklahoma. It just so happens she taught more lyrical ballet rather than classical ballet. We said au revoir and found a much better dance studio for her.

Football has been the name of the game for my son the line backer. We’ve attended all sorts of pre-games including one held at the Dallas Cowboy Stadium in my hometown of Arlington. The high school here is something else and has the coolest pep rallies!

hs sophomore football player familybringsjoy.com

Can I just end by saying YOU ARE AWESOME! I’m so grateful for my faithful readers…my new ones as well! Hope everyone has a super day!

YOU matter…I promise,

Filed Under: MY Family Brings Joy, Values Bring Joy

You Never Know…

July 10, 2014 By Shan 3 Comments

I have this little plaque in our playroom.

“You never know what you have…until you clean your room.”

Well, this goes for your whole house too. After living for 43 years, you tend to collect a lot of stuff. Yet, when you have a family, it multiplies. Even though our family has moved 7 times since my husband & I got married (20 years ago,) we STILL have too much stuff. To be honest, in the past, I didn’t make a big enough effort to purge as much as I should have. I’m doing things differently this time. Instead of jumping right into packing and haphazardly giving a few things away here and there, I have been primarily focusing on PURGING the last few months.

Here’s the deal, I come from sweet parents who are sentimental and like to hold onto things. I come by it honest. {That saying might be a southern thang…he he he} Personally, I really think there is a genetic disposition when it comes to this. It’s been interesting, because my husband likes to throw things away. He would rather throw things of value away than give them away. I can’t do that. If it has value, if someone else can use it…I would rather give it away. Otherwise, I feel it’s like taking dollar bills and throwing them away. I definitely see it’s easier to throw things away since it cuts out the sorting step and taking it to the local charity. However, we initially paid for the items or someone gave them to us (which they paid for) and I can’t throw that money away.

If you’ve been reading here for awhile you know I have ADD. I like to share the ins and outs of what it’s like to have it. Mine is the inattentive kind. Medicine has been miraculous for me. However, when it comes to having a high stress level, like now, sometimes the medicine doesn’t work as much as I’d like. I only realized I had ADD about 11 years ago. So pre-medicine days (32 years) I would get so overwhelmed, there wouldn’t be much purging or sorting. I was doing good to just have everything packed for moving day. To take a box and sort through it is almost like torture. The act of making so many decisions is so mentally taxing on me that it effects me physically. After going through several boxes I am completely wiped out. I know my ADD has something to do with this. My brain works differently than someone without ADD.

Over the years, I’ve been trying to teach my children about letting go of things they don’t need or use anymore. I seem to have done a good enough job with my two oldest…it’s the youngest who is resistant. Yet, I have been so pleased with her progress while we’ve been sorting. I found it’s easier on her to give away things to people she knows and cares for. It’s funny…she will make a pile for charity and then she will have an even bigger pile for our friends. Personally, I find it easier to give things of value or emotional significance to my friends as well. My best friend is also moving {yet she is moving 2 hours North of here, while I will be moving almost 3 hours South. } Anyway, there are many toys we’ve kept that my kids no longer play with. {Partly because I’m in denial they aren’t little anymore.} We’ve had them in the playroom and when little ones come over to our house they know where they are. I enjoy seeing the kids play with the toys. Since we are downsizing, we won’t have room to store these toys anymore. I’m grateful my youngest was able to give those toys to my best friend’s kids (who are much younger than my kids.) Bestie sends me texts of the kids playing with the toys and it feels so great knowing the items are in a good home.

So, I’m off to go through more boxes. Most of the boxes now are in the attic. I’ve pretty much gone through the stuff in the home. We have a HUGE attic, though and it was completely FULL before we began this process. I refuse to move it all. If it’s been in the attic all this time, I haven’t missed it much, right? Moving is stressful but if it motivates me to purge and simplify…that’s a good thing. I need to keep telling myself that during this process.

I hope everyone is having a good summer!

Lighten your load,

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

June 26, 2014 By Shan Leave a Comment

Just a few weeks ago, we were blessed with the opportunity to host 2 young men (high school) in our home from Canada. The Canadian’s came to play a 5 day long baseball tournament against 8 other state teams: Arizona, Colorado, Georgia, Missouri, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Tennessee and Texas. It’s kind of crazy they come to our little remote town in the middle of no where Oklahoma. But they do, and it’s a BIG DEAL. {College scouts come from all over} Anyway, what’s even more insane is that 200 of these baseball players stay in homes of families in the community. I believe that most families house 2 boys, but there are some families who had up to 5 in their home. Over the 7 years we have lived here, I’ve heard heartwarming stories about this tournament…really the experience of hosting the players. Now we know why.

Above is one of our boys {yes, we host families used that term} we hosted at bat. {For privacy’s sake we will call him #17} I love this photo because it also has the whole team and coaches in the background too. Below, 17 is running from second to third.

Above 17 makes it to home plate. I love how my camera captured him looking as though he is on his toes. 17 played designated hitter about half of the time while the other half he played outfield. Now let me introduce our next boy, #21. He is one of the pitchers on the team and stands at 6’4″. He is TALL! And he can pitch a fast ball.

I swear it looks like he almost does the splits when he throws the ball.

There was a digital display of the speeds for all the pitches thrown and below shows the speed of one of 21’s pitches. I know he threw some faster ones, but this is what it was when I decided to take a photo of his speed.

In the above photo you can see how tall 21 is compared to the rest of the team. Below is both the boys after a win!

One night we had a team swim party and they still played baseball…{that’s 17 with the bat}

Below – Us host moms took a photo together. We had fun talking about ‘our boys.’ All of us host families got to know each other. It’s like we were a big extended family. We sat together at all the games…cheered for our boys. We all had great experiences with our baseball players. It was fun learning more about the Canadian culture. There is NO TELLING what they said about our southern accents. Best of all is how quickly they were able to integrate into our families. My son loved having ‘brothers’ for the week. All of the kids enjoyed having older ‘brothers.’ The other moms talked about how they would play with their kids and help out around the house. They were true gentlemen with gracious manners.

Below 17 plays catch with my daughter. Isn’t that sweet?

I caught a quick shot of the boys in the back yard before they started their outdoor adventures.

On the next to the last night of the tournament they announced all of the players and their host families. We walked on the field. (below)

After, we took a big photo of the team with all the families. (below)

Believe it or not, the last photo was before they boarded the bus to go to the airport. I’m glad I wasn’t in the photo because it was sad for me to say goodbye to these 2 young men. We ate meals together, I helped them with their laundry, drove them to their games…basically did all the things mom’s do for their own kids. What can I say, I’m a softy. I’m so glad we had this experience before we move back to Texas. I hope to keep in touch with them and know they have a bright future playing baseball at a college here in America. By the way, in case you are wondering how Team Canada did in the tournament…they won 2 out of 9 games. However, they beat their record from last year where they lost every game. You have to understand, baseball is not a popular sport in Canada. As a matter of fact, they don’t have high school or college baseball in Canada. These 2 boys come from a private club team. So the Canadians have a little disadvantage competing against southern boys who have probably played baseball since they were tiny. #17 has only been playing baseball for a couple of years. Personally, {& yes, I’m proud to say I’m biased} I thought they did great! I was very impressed with the team and their coaches. I was worried they might be in bad moods after losing games, but they never were. They were happy to be here and happy to be playing the game. For us Team Canada families, they are number one.

Baseball brings joy,

Filed Under: Friends Bring Joy, Home Brings Joy, MY Family Brings Joy, Photography Brings Joy, Values Bring Joy

It’s Time For A Change

May 20, 2014 By Shan 6 Comments

Big news coming at you today…we are moving back to Texas.

There’s a saying, “You can take the girl out of Texas, but not the Texas out of the girl.”

This is true. We’ve been living in Oklahoma for 7 years now. And even though it is only one state north from Texas, it’s just not the same.

Much has happened while we have lived here. My oldest graduated from high school. We built our dream home. We paid off loans and got out of debt. I’ve made relationships which will last even after we move. Yet, it’s time for this city girl to move back to the city. It’s time to be closer to my family in Texas.

While I am ready to move on…I wish I could take my house with us. Leaving the home we custom built will be the most difficult part of moving for me. I realize to some it might not make sense. Some people might see our home and say, “if I had that house, I would never move.” However, a house is just a house. It is the people you share it with that matter. There is a scripture I have been pondering about much lately from Matthew in the New Testament:

Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:

But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. Matthew 6:19-21

This reminds me to keep my heart on what really matters.

All last week I purged and cleaned preparing for the realtor to come and take photos of the house. After picking up my youngest from school I realized one of the outdoor throw pillows, which had blown over to our house, belonged to our neighbor across the street. Their front porch had a chair with a pillow that matched. I decided to walk it over to them. After I placed the pillow on the pillow-less chair, I turned around to see our house. There it was. Of course…I was just across the street. It looked beautiful and a feeling of sadness washed over me. I know I was exhausted from all the work I had been doing that day. It could have been the amount of stress had built up and the emotions just over took me. I took a picture with my phone and posted it on Instagram. It’s not that I was wanting to gloat about my house. It was more about wanting to share the feelings I was experiencing with the sweet friends I have made on the community of Instagram.

I find myself wanting to explain how I feel, but then this ongoing argument plays in the back of my mind. “You don’t have to explain how you feel. But, people might not understand. That’s OK if they don’t understand, they aren’t you. You don’t have to justify your feelings.” I guess part of me wanting to explain is a challenge I want to take on. The other part thinks it might be therapeutic for me.

Being a full time stay at home mom has been challenging for me. I have creative tendencies which went on the back burner for many years while my kids were young. As a matter of fact, it’s been the past few years, while my kids have been at school full time, I have realized how much of myself I kind of “put away.” I thought to be a good mom, I needed to let go of things I loved doing for the sake of the family. I’m not sure where I got this idea, but it doesn’t matter now. Anyway, when we built our house, it was like a full time job. I quickly became an amateur architect and designer. It took over a year to build our house. We moved in and then it was a full time job putting things away and decorating. Over the past 5 years I have truly enjoyed sharing my home here on Family Brings Joy. I like sharing my DIY projects and seeing them pinned on Pinterest. I like it when friends tell me they have seen my laundry room or craft room on Pinterest. {Thank you to all those who have pinned!} So, I guess I feel as though the process of building our house and making it a home, I kind of found myself again. Plus, it is a HUGE accomplishment. I don’t want to feel like I’m throwing away this accomplishment or myself. I know I’m not. But maybe that is where part of the sadness is coming from? However, truly most of the sadness is knowing our dream home has not appreciated in value. Due to the failing economy, we will not regain the amount of money it cost for us to build our home. This is what really brings me grief. Your house is supposed to be an investment. Right? You shouldn’t have to LOSE money when you sell your home.

Listen up…I know it depends on where you live and what the market is like, but if you are considering building a custom home, you need to be aware of some key points before building. (And let me throw in here, we built our house with the intention of not moving. However, you never know what life has in store for you.)

1. The cost your builder quotes to build your floor plan is only an ESTIMATE. (plan to pay more)

2. The builder will not include the concrete for your driveway in your estimate. This is an extra expense and is not cheap.

3. A custom builder does not include landscaping. Landscaping, including grass sod and flower beds are an additional cost.

4. Other additional costs for us we had not considered before building were the cost of a septic system and propane tank because we live outside the city limits.

The above points are not including the cost of the land. And I guarantee adding a pool will not increase the value of your home even though it should! I think having a pool is a huge selling point. So however much money it costs to build a pool, plan on throwing that money away. Don’t get me wrong, I believe there is much value in having a pool, but that will be a post for another day.

I’ll stop my ranting now. I just think people should be informed of the cost of building a custom home. I guarantee the supplies to build a home have increased in cost since we built over 5 years ago. This means to build our house, just like it is today, will cost substantially more than what we paid to build it, not to mention the stress and time it takes to build.

So, if by chance you have come to my site because you are considering purchasing our home…you are getting an amazing deal! Go to the tab at the top of this site titled House Tour and take a look around. The majority of the house has already been photographed. However, I am going to go into more detail with future posts about unique features of our home. If you are not looking to purchase our home, that’s okay. You are welcome to tour the house and receive some great ideas for your own home or a future home. Be sure and pin what you like on Pinterest for your future reference. 😉

Change can bring joy,

Filed Under: Home Brings Joy, Other Emotions, Photography Brings Joy, Values Bring Joy

Moms Bring Joy

May 11, 2014 By Shan 1 Comment

Let’s Celebrate with Photos!

Mom & I Christmas 2013 familybringsjoy.com

Me & My Mom

My 2 Youngest & I

It’s difficult finding a photo of all 3 of the kids with me. {take note self} I’m usually the one behind the camera taking the photos. My oldest daughter took the above photo before she left for college in the fall (first day of school for the youngest kids.) My Step Dad took the one below when my youngest came home for her spring break.

Me, Mom & Oldest…3 Generations

And the following was taken only 2 years ago and now my son is taller than his big sister.

Blue Lily Photography for familybringsjoy.com

Where They Were Born (Photo taken in 2012 by Blue Lily Photography)

My youngest girl will be 11 tomorrow!

Youngest, Friday at her friend party

Moms Bring Joy,

Filed Under: MY Family Brings Joy, Photography Brings Joy, Values Bring Joy

Semi-Wordless Wednesday Wedding Style

May 7, 2014 By Shan Leave a Comment

Remember my friend who I helped host her bridal shower? Here are some photos I took at her gorgeous wedding…vintage style.

Welcome to the magnificent glass Thorncrown Chapel in Eureka Springs, Arkansas.

Below, the groom sees the bride walking down the aisle.

Can I just say how much I HATE those huge ferns! Really!? They really are a distraction. Ok, I’m done ranting now.

I love the above photo with the groom looking at my friend. Just in this photo you can tell how much he loves her.

I know the above photo is blurry, but I LOVE it! He was so happy and was skipping down the aisle. And the huge grin on both their faces is awesome.

Above my friend’s daughters following the bride and groom down the aisle as Mr. & Mrs. A new family is born.

Last photo I shot after the ceremony was over. Isn’t this a romantic setting for a wedding?

So HAPPY for them!

Here I am on the way to the wedding sporting my new Chloe & Isabel Crystal + Chain Strands Stretch Headband and my favorite earrings called the Art Deco Starburst Earrings. You know I had to throw this in. 😉 Us short haired girls can wear headbands too.

Above photo shows me wearing the C + I Coral Statement Ring and Heirloom Coral Statement Necklace. They were the perfect vintage feel to go with the wedding and the maxi dress I wore. You can find these unique, quality jewelry pieces by going to Jewelry Brings Joy, my online boutique for Chloe + Isabel.

Weddings bring joy,

Filed Under: Photography Brings Joy, Values Bring Joy