Terrible Poverty

My husband’s profession has brought about many moves for our family. Our last move (1/2007) took us to a charming little city of about 20,000. We have lived in a small place before and enjoyed the feeling of community & camaraderie. I usually don’t have a difficult time making friends wherever we have moved. However, this time it has been extraordinarily difficult.

Two of the good friends I’ve made here have moved away. I do have one good friend who has younger children than mine and we can’t get together as often as we would like. Plus I know she has other friends she likes to spend time with besides me. 🙂

Maybe people just don’t get together and do things here? I have tried to invite some girls to do things with me and something always comes up and they cancel. I try not to take it personally. But how can I not?

Staying at home without having other women to talk to or do things with every once in a while…well, it gets lonely. I recently posted a quote on facebook from Mother Teresa. “The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”

My husband came home and asked me if I was lonely. I asked him why and he said I don’t usually quote Mother Teresa. He just knows how I feel.

If it were not for facebook, I would feel incredibly lonely. I think about all my friends I have made through the years and still keep in touch with. They are friends whom I cherish and would be doing things with if we lived close by. I miss them.

Shan

Finally!

  • …we are moved in to our new house! (wish I could say we are completely unpacked HA!)
  • …I am online again! (Laptop only at this point)
  • …everything is moved out of the old house, as of today.
  • …my son hit his first ball at a game tonight!
  • …the kids were able to swim in the pool for the first time today!
  • …we are able to drive on all our concrete.
  • …I knew where something was when my kid’s asked me the dreaded question, ” Where is xxxx?” That is HUGE. Wish I could find so many things!

These last 2-3 weeks have been grueling. My body aches all over. I am emotionally drained and running on empty. There are boxes upon boxes left to be unpacked. At this point, it looks as if I will never be able to go through all of them. The word overwhelmed doesn’t even describe how I am feeling. It is way beyond overwhelmed. I never thought that would be possible until now. I am not sure if it is 15 years worth of possessions, having impossibly aggressive renters in our old house, construction not complete on our new home, not able to get our secondary mortgage until the house is complete, being older or what, but this has been the absolute worst move in my entire life. It is wonderful to be able to move in to a new home and when it is complete I will be ecstatic. For now, it is awful having workers here at all hours with no privacy. Walking around seeing things undone. Not able to put our dishes away because of needing to vacuum out the drawers and cabinets first.

I never would have been able to get through this without our church family and very wonderful and supportive friends. (My faith and prayer goes without saying) Thank you to my parents and neighbors for the lovely plants that brightened my day. Thank you to my wonderful husband who worked on his days off & on his long lunch breaks by helping me pack and load.

Sorry I vented so much. Now I am too exhausted to think of what to say next. My mind is reeling with thoughts. A hymn just came to mind. Whenever my kids are complaining a lot, I begin to sing the chorus line to the Hymn Count Your Blessings.

“Count your blessings name them one by one, count your blessings see what God has done, count your blessings, name them one by one. Count your many blessings see what God has done.”

It is so true. When we begin to look at all that God has done in our lives, how can we begin to complain or be ungrateful. Please forgive me. I know that hard times are just a refining fire and make me a better person.

Count your Blessings,

Shan